From 2008 with an edit
In Surprised by Joy which details his conversion experience C.S.Lewis eloquently paints a picture of the wonder and longing that came from remembering a toy garden his brother had during their childhood in Belfast, Ireland. In describing that moment Lewis states that he does not know where the longing came from but the emptiness of the moment was overwhelming as he reconstructed the memory, but before he could derive happiness from his attempt at instant recall the moment left him as soon as it had appeared. Skipping stones and playing hopscotch fleetingly enter the mind as reminders of a simpler time. As soon as we think of the beauty that was within, the immediacy of today jolts us into reality and we have to say sorry to our thoughts of purity and put them on hold for another day.
Calling a loved one to thank them for the memories and making an effort to return
to the scenes of your youth seem so hard to do. Seven billion people, a couple of hundred
countries, languages interspersed globally and a marketplace without
boundaries finds people everywhere except where the longing in the heart wants
them to be. Every packed bag, every scanned ticket and every stamped passport
tell the same story of miles to go before we reach the destination that has no definition
and a goal that manifests into more longing when we reach it. Rather than
muddle in the mire of this doubt we need to contemplate as to what will fill this
void? Why doesn’t a rational world, full of logic seek answers that are simple and solutions that have stood the test of time? Are there really absolutes in this world that allow man in his quest to walk alongside proven-peace and seek the righteousness of one who loved him so much that it was actually free? Can we look at this world and apologize in the words of John Chrysostom by saying that we have had the honor of inhabiting a planet of grandeur without being asked for rent?
So where am I going with this? The hardest thing for humanity is its frailty to
comprehend the need for something bigger than itself. The most important apology you can make is to yourself for not believing in the simplicity of a divine conductor who is waiting for you to pick up your given instrument to play in his heavenly orchestra. The trips will continue and the years will become memoirs filled with pictures of beaches and reminders of reunions-but the longing for the simplicity of a toy garden or the winding road at the end of your street where you stopped to look back at your childhood home will never fully go away. Look ahead to the one who said I came to love you and in doing so will give you the portrait of a future painted with the gift of your acknowledgement on the canvas of your existence. That’s what I want. Just say “Thank you Lord for granting me favor in accepting my apology.” Your world will become clearer and your journey lighter because for the first time you will see your ride complete in the eyes of the pilot who says, “You are mine and I have claimed you.”